Dear Dr. Mr. NT,
Five years ago, my wife and I decided to let our son join the school band. He had been begging for months to let him join up, he had dreams of becoming “section leader” playing the trumpet. He said boys in band were the coolest guys and he wanted to be part of the club. We were dubious, as our son was prone to adopting and abandoning hobbies and projects rather quickly.
Well, to say the least, he took to trumpet like a fish to water. He practiced every waking hour that wasn’t taken up by chores and schoolwork. He advanced very quickly and did indeed eventually become section leader of his school band.
The problem is the boy will not stop. Our home is constantly filled with trumpet noise, from sun up until we scream at him that it’s time for bed. Since he graduated he has shown no interest in or intent to find a job, he only has time for trumpeting, to put it in his words.
My wife and I are at our wits end. We love our son and want him to succeed at what he loves but his refusal to leave home and get work in order to “stick it to Gillespie” while playing trumpet day and night are about to drive us to drink.
How can we get through to him that life cannot revolve around just one thing and that he can overcome the legacy of Gillespie while also maintaining a steady job?
-Trumpeted Out, Kenosha
Dear Trumpeted Out,
You don’t have a trumpet problem. You have a Gillespie problem.
The legacy of that master hornblower has weighed itself so heavily against your son’s soul that he is trapped until he overcomes Gillespie’s skill. This is the classic ghost trick perpetrated by the late jazzman. His restless spirit is known for ensnaring young boys with the music of jazz, to the point that they become obsessed with surpassing the Bopper of Brass himself.
It is that sexual trumpet energy that feeds and sustains this woeful shade. There is only one way to break your son free from this curse.
You must offer of yourself to The Dizzy One. Your boy is young and naive and he will not willingly put down his horn and cede the fight to Gillespie. You must get yourself a horn and blow it nightly until the ghost’s attentions turn to you.
I won’t lie. This is the end for you. Once you have willingly submitted yourself to the intentions of Gillespie, your fate is assured. You WILL become his thrall. His desire for trumpet energy is paramount. He will have you. But your sweet boy will be saved. Your time is over, it is now time for your boy to shine, and you will become a part of Dizzy Gillespie’s Soul Carnival forever.
Hope this helps.
Mr. NT out.
