Category: Nintendo Tape Reviews

A$$es will be waxed in this race against the world’s most powerful bad boy of cars.

Humans love speed (all kinds). In the old days of arcade, you could race with Poll Position (good) or Outrun (better) or even Daytona, USA (best). But if you wanted to have a real, personal rival who would trash talk you and then later tell you how cool you’re being, then Track and Field Presents: The Need for Speed nintendo tape for the 3DO system is what you are after. What you need. That’s why its the name of the tape.

The 3DO video game system was one of the very first (maybe first, i dont’ know) consoles where the nintendo tapes started coming on DVD. It came out in 1994 and it cost like 700 bucks. I was too poor for it, but my friend Andy always had money for such things. He was a total gear head so when he saw you could get a The Need For Speed at home with arcade 3D graphics, he bought it right away. Well let me tell you, when he did that, my visits to his house increased A LOT.

He had Rebal Aussalt II (star wars tape), a sampler DVD that had part of a Mister Freeze batman cartoon episode (nice), and the best one, Field and Stream Presents: The Need for Speed tape. And’ys house had always ruled. Andy was fun to hang out with, and his parents were always so real nice to me. Nicer than anyone’s parents. His mom showed me “strawberry milk” for the first time when I was 14 (life changer) and his dad worked at Coke so they had a whole spare bedroom that was devoted to cases and cases of Coke branded pops.

Let me tell you, I drank every single one of the pops that coke made, I am pretty much a expert on it. All flavors. Also, every time I stayed the night, they brought us whatever fast food we wanted. Which was ALWAYS mcdonald or rallys! Best two. Me and Andy were total Rally dudes. “Big Buford” was my middle name (Because thats the name of the burger I got there, i got one of those and a rally burger and fries because eating a lot of good stuff makes the sadness go away till youre’ done.

So in 1994, Andy got that 3DO and when he handed me the controller and I hit the gas in my red car, I was addicted right away. I was always a big racing game kid on arcade. I hated the ones at home bc the graphics were not good enough in those olden days to make you really feel like you were going fast. And I love to feel like I am going fast. But not like Sonic the hedgehog he is too perferted now because of all the internet drawings I seen of him doing dirty stuff about feet and Bowsers’ feet. Yuck. I can’t even go back and play the one good sonic tape (1) anymore. All I can see is him wanting to live inside bowsers shoe.

So fast cars are for me. I dont’ know names of cars but “red one” was my favorite in that game. It could go totally fast, heh heh. You have to make sure you win or the tape will play a video of your rival trash talking you! When you win a race against him he makes you feel cool because he praises you in a bad boy way and it feels good to be praised bc no one ever does it to you in real life. Only in tapes. So that was awesome. He was like an extra friend for you to have.

Be careful if you race in this game…there is a true satans army type enemy and I don’t mean the racing bad boy rival. There are actual COPS in this tape! And if they catch you they will pull you over and give you a ticket. Getting a ticked sucks and cops are always mean. They will tell you that you should stop shaking and looking like you’re going to cry, you just have an expired inspection sticker and its not a big deal and no, you’re over 18 so they dont have to tell your parents and no you dont’ have to go to prison. They get super annoyed with you when they pull you over because you can’t “get it together, for christ sake” and when they hand you your 80 dollar ticked and leave, it takes you ten minutes to calm down until you can drive to rally’s and get TWO big bufords because you know that one big buford and one rally burger are not going to get the job done so you need two double burgers to make the upset feelings go away. And where are you going to get 80 dollars when you lost your job at Pizza Shop because you started getting bored of it and they fired you for not showing up anymore?? Life is unfair and cops are the most unfair people on earth!!!!!!!!!!!!! Idiots.

So in the end Andy and me played a lot of Track and Stream Presents: The Need for Speed and he was better because he was always a car guy. I was not that good at it so I had to get a lot of tickets and that always made me feel rotten but the lucky thing was Andys’ mom always gave me strawberry milk which helped. Awesome.

Thanks to this tape I did know what I was doing when I had a “drag race” with Ellis a few months later in the middle of the night (my parents got a new dodge monaco and he “wanted to see what it could do”) and I almost flipped my car and Leon my friend from quebec was riding with me and when the tires screeched he screamed a bunch of cuss words in french and that was cool. l I made him tell me what it meant after he calmed down. Now thanks to need for speed i know that tabernak is really bad word up there!! Cool.

So that is why I give Field and Ammo Presents: The Need for Speed a 7/10.

Rest in Peace Brenan Baird.

Descendant of Erdrick, you are called upon to rise against the vile Dragonlord and free the people from his evil rule! But first…you must whack these happy looking Slimes with a stick for a few hours so you can buy a sword and walk more than twenty feet from the first town. JFC.

That is why todays’ review is Dragon Warrior nintendo tape for NES.

If you had never played a roll playing game before Dragon Warrior then I got bad news! You were destined to die over and over and not understand who would play this piece of crap! So like everyone I tossed it into the “bad game” pile for a few months. And it would have stayed there if my brother in law hadn’t come to our house and stayed with us and taught me dungeon and dragon that christmas! He taught me about experience points, “stats” and armor and hit points! (HP)

It was a lot to learn and I asked him to train me as a dungon master which now as a adult age of 44 I am embarrassed about and I know it was a dumb thing to say but I was 12 so just calm down and stop making fun of me about it in your mind. He looked awkward when I asked him that in front of my Aunt and Uncle.

So the king is mad. For one, his daughter has been taken (of coarse) by a dragon and is being held in a dungeon. Also he is mad because a dude by name of Dragonlord stole a ball of light and is turning the world into poisonous crap and making monsters just go around wrecking stuff. The monsters look pretty happy about that. They always have a big grin on there face which makes it pretty fun to beat them to death just to get them to stop smiling. They look like they got a dose of the ol joker forumla name SMILEX. Which is cool.

Joker is a great villain so anything that reminds you of him as a bad guy automatically becomes even better in your mind. That is why some enemies smile in games and movies, everyone knows joker is a good villain (even though he is usually the good guy and batman is the true villain if you think about it… being bullied made him into jocker in first place) so it makes you want to rent their game or movie even more and more.

So before you get mad and throw the game into a pile, let me tell you. Go outside of the town after you collect some supplies from the castle then hit Slimes and Drackies with your club until you have some money to buy a shield and sword. And get EXP points which level you up! Not level like Mario. But your character power is LEVEL in this game. So level 2 means you got more strength and magic and you can hit harder! So do that for a few hours until youre’ bored. MAKE SURE if you get hurt to go rest in the inn. It is only a few gold and you make more than that killing the monsters. Eventually you can start walking further and further from town and the adventure TRULY begins.

You can save princess Gwaylen and the king will be happy, you can search for items like the armor of your great grandpa Erdrick, things like that. But what you want is that ball of light the king told you about. That will let you bring good back to the world but dragonlord has it! You have to get through a whole world to get to him though! it will take you many hours… you will face many dungeons and monsters and bosses…but if you are smart like me you will bring lots of torches because the dungons are total crap.

If you dont have a torch you can only see one square around you! and the dungeons are giant mazes it is the worst. So buy a lot of them. i cried in one because i got so mad and sad about how I ran out and mom asked me what was wrong and i said i was out of torches and instead of helping me to get some in the game her answer was for me to put the game down for the night and calm down!!!!!!!! wrong anwser !!!!!!!!!!!!

The game can be hard to understand because it talks like it is the Bible. Thou this and thee that, it is weird. I think it may be based on the bible. I dont’ know for sure but there is a lot of stuff that is similar to what i remember about the bible. i had to read about it in AWANA. I always called this girl from AWANA name Summer to pretend to do bible studdy. She was nice and I had to lie to her just bc i had a crush on her. She wanted to help me with jesus but i wanted her to be my girl friend. It is one of my secret shames that I had to lie to a girl to talk to her. I am sorry to you Summer i hope you still practice the forgivness spells that we learned at AWANA and can forgive me. if not i understand. But i want to tell you that i don’t lie to talk to women or anyone anymore. due to this I am very shy since I dont use the powers of lying anymore. its ok I have my nintendo tapes. and that is how we live and learn. sometimes even the jocker can rise above his scars…., >:)

So when you come to DARGONLORD he asks you to become one with him and join his cause! And you can even choose yes which I did the first time I got to him!!!! And instead of getting to play as a cool evil knight which is what I thought would happen, the screen just turns pink and freezes. I HAD TO RESET THE GAME AND GO THRU THAT DUNGEN AGAIN. I cried a second time and mom said maybe we won’t play that tape anymore but that just made me cry harder!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WRONG AWNSER MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO when you finally get back to him and say NO dum ass! I do not join you! You get to actually fight him,.and he is hard as h3ll!!!!!! He tried to use a spell call STOPSPELL and if it works you cant use heal spell??? but you can beat the sh!t out of him with the spell HURTMORE which is the better version of HURT spell. Attack him to force him to reveal his evil dragon form!!!!!! then the fight truly begens…heheh.

so you beat him in the end and get your ball of light if your smart you will use HEALMORE and HURTMORE and use double sward hit on him. You have to go back to the castle after and king tells you to just take his land and rule it instead. Like he is so happy he just wants to give you his whole country lmao. Like chill out dude god d@m.
So you tell him no that is a dum as$ idea, i will just go conker my own country because i am such a bad ass now i cant be fuckin* stopped at all. The kings daughter hears this and runs out and says COUNT ME IN LETS GO THRASH SOME SH!T and then the game ends…and in part two you even play as your characters great grandkid and you start in the country he dominated with his new wife! I love dragon warrior games they are awesome and i still play them when new ones come out even though they changed the names of them to DRAGON QUEST. I dont know why they just did dragon warrior was WAY cooler bc warriors are much more bad ass$ than quests lmao. like yeah , warriors GO on quests, that part is implied itiots!!!

anyway i tried to apologize to summer and she blocked me on myspace in 2007 and pretended not to know who I was and said it was creepy for me to message her and say that. so whatever…society shown me my true face,,,and it is a face that now is always smiling…. >:)~

that is why i rate DRAGON WARRIOR 1/10

“Pack it in!” Remember that classic line. Comix Zone is the nintendo tape you want to play if you ever wandered what it is like to LEAP into the world of comix boox…literally! I hope you are a brave soul…you will need all the bravery you can MUSTAR to defeat this adult bad a$$es game! In this tape you have a awesome set of cool guy shorts with a red x on them. AND a pony tail and cool round glasses.

That is why todays’ review is Comix Zone nintendo tape for the Sega Gensesis.

This tape came out in 1995 and that was my first year as an adult man age of 18. It was a fresh start to make zero mistakes in my life because your slate gets wiped totally clean when you are 18. I blew it when my friend Aaron and me downloaded a hack from a phreaker zine BBS that taught us to steal from pepsi machines. It rocked but it made us evil.

Sketch Turner is the main character of Comix Zone and he looked like the baddest ass that ever lived back then. cool jacket with sleeves rolled up ( i still do that today a bad a$$ move, looks cool) a pony tail (i had one at 18 but now my hair fell out) little round sunglasses like Dwayne Wayne from A Differnt World (another hero of mine) cool combat boots, and black shorts with a red X on them AND the ultimate street combat bad a$$ clothes: fingerless black gloves!!!! So tough, hehe.

In the tape Comix Zone, you play as the ultimate badd a$$ name Sketch Turner. I don’t know if his birth name is sketch or if he chose it as a nickname because he grew up to be an artist but I do know its a cool freaking name and I have considered changing my name legally to Sketch Mr.Nintendo tapes on more than one occasion. I just always wanted to feel cool and admired and maybe that someone could think i was handsome and well Sketch Turner was all those things to all people. So I think it is a good goal! So Sketch is a comix artist and rocker living in new yourk with his pet rat. I dont remember its name. But the rat could help you with stuff in the game. And like any rocker, Sketch loves to drink pop. I always liked drinking the kind of pop that had extreme commercials like Zap! or Xtreme Blader Soda Pop etc. I was a big time skater of in line skates so i needed a lot of energy and attitude back then! It ruled!!!!!!! I could even ramp.

So when the Comix Zone tape starts, the evil villain of Sketch’s comic (Mortos) comes to life and transports him into his own comic world he created, so the bad guy can murder him and escape the comic and rule our world. The truly wicked part of this tape is that the levels are made out of comix boox pages! You go from one comic boox square to the next, while Bad Guy Mortus draws enemies for you to beat the sh!t out of while your pulse pounds to the rocking sound track. If you are young you may not know the 90s had bad a s s guitar music for everything! Even commercials about toy slime or pizza bagle things. That way you knew the products were good not like now where it is all tame and no attitude about anything. Nothing zooms in fast and shaky with a heavy metal guitar screech on TV anymore. Its sucks.

When you quantum leap into the comic you meat a woman named Alissa who explains to you that you are the chosen one and if you dont beat the ass off of Mortis then he is going to explode a nuke and escape into our real world or something. So then you go into the comix zone and begin whipping asses all over the place. Alissa pipes in with some advice letting you know if a box is suspicious or if you should use your rat. So you keep destroying the things you drew in your comic that have now turned against you! You go page to page until you fight the boss and move to the next episode which is dumb they should have called it issues. Because it is a comix book????? Not tv.

Anyway alissa is captured as all girlfriends and women of the time were (kind of dumb every time there was a woman in a game or something they just got turned into a treasure for you to win, always happened over and over and seemed insulting if your a woman. idk.)
and you have to save her from drowning in a tube while you fight Mortus. If you can beat him in time and save her then you can be boyfriend and girlfriend in the real world. Your rat will come too and it says he gets a bunch of cheese and lives under your dirty socks. nasty.
If you kill Mortes but cant save her then the nuke explaodes and kills everything but you . Then you are depressed even though you won.

Me and aaron were able to use the hack we learned in the PHREAKER internet zine to make over five bucks in quarters and got a few dozen free pops from the machine. It was cool because the machine we stole from was right beside the Chuck. E. Cheese and we used all our quarters to play arcade games. I played Time Pilot and never could get more than thirty seconds out of one quarter on it. it took us like an hour to steal all the money. The cops cant’t sue me over this. And Aarons girlfriend worked there so we even got a deal on a pizza >:)~

I begged to have glasses liek Dwayne Wayne for 4 years straight and never got them though. And I think that is why I got beat up and made fun of so much in school because no one would do that to dwayne wayne and if I could have just been him my life would have turned out nice. But I didnt.

So I give Comix Zone a 1/10.

Remember the little dough boy Megaman for your baby toy, the NES? Well he is OUT OF HERE. Make room for his teenage step-bro, X!!!! X is the NEW Megaman for the adult console SUPER Nintendo and he is full of Bad Boy attitude and his Girlfriend Zero is even more wicked!

You see, Doctor Light decided old Megaman was soft and stupid (correct) and then built an ALPHA wolf Megman and named him X. But see, here’s the thing. Dr. Light killed himself before he completed X, but he was nice enough to leave UPGRADE PODS all over the game for him to find and complete his body to become the ultimate weapon.

The world is being destroyed by a new villain (dr wily is also dead, this is millions of years after old Megaman tapes) name of SMIGMA.
Well Sigma is basically a new dr. willy, because he also makes evil robots who go nuts and murder people and try to destroy the world. But now, instead of using a dumb looking little boy robot, you get to use the powerful alphawolf robot X who has a rockin girlfriend name ZERO.

She dies at the end which is even cooler for X because he now becomes the tragic hero…until X3!!! When you can even play as the reseurected zero and she has a LIGHTSABER!! Bad ass,..

The tape is a lot like old Megman because you get a screen with all the bosses and you have to select who you want to destroy first. When you kill the boss, you inheret there power. So if Devil Armadilo can use a rolling shot you can also use a rolling shot after you kill him and take his soul.

See, every boss is weak against a different boss soul weapon. And it is up to YOU to hunt them all and test their soul weapons out against each of them until you discover how to easily kill them. X’ has a mega buster arm shooter, but it is very weak and only good for low level monsters not bosses. So it is important to steal souls and upgrade your shooter in order to be successful at this tape!

You fight and kill and steal souls until you are totally powered up in your god armor and feel the dead robot souls flowing through you and decide it is time to attack the castle of Simga,,,where you will discover your Girlfriend zero is still alive after being blown in half at the beginning of the game…but your reunien is short lived! Because you soon discover that SIGMA’s body guard is also alive! And zero kills herself with a bomb to weaken him up for you to finish off. After you get through that part you have to defeat all of the robot bosses again before you can even THINK about facing off against smigma.

But since you learned their weaknesses, it is not a problem since you already have their powers. Once you defeat the soulless robots with their own powers, you can then fight SIGMA and become the robot overlord yourself. You know that Zero may come back to life in part two so you look out upon the world you have saved and wonder what other alpha wolf sh!t you can get up to so that everyone knows you are still the bad a$$ here.

This tape came out in 1993 but I had gotten my first sip from this bad asses power cup in a earlier issue of Nintendo Power magazine. That is the magazine where I learned all the greatest pro tips and techs (techniques). Everyone always wondered how I knew all the hottest secrets in the most popular games and this magazine was my secret weapon.

I had a subscription of my OWN for it because my sister felt guilty for all the times she would beat me up before I became a strong teen and punched her so hard in the stomach that she threw up and then stopped hitting me. Guilt can be a powerful ally but I do not recommend you hit anyone unless it is self defence!!! That is the only reason I slugged her was to show her that the beating of her little brother ENDS HERE. So in that way I saved myself the way X saves the world, except I did not inherit any soul power from her when I defeated her.

I dont’t even know what soul power she would have given me. “Crying over her boyfriend breaking up with her again” maybe. Like, no thanks I cry enough for my own reasons dum a$$. lol.

That is the reason I had a subscription to Nintendo Power and all the other kids asked ME how to take down a boss or hard level.I was basically the “Nintendo Tape Kid” (grew up to become Mr. NintendoTapes) and it was awesome! I also used some money I would get to buy the magazine called “GamePro” Heheh, I had many secret arsenals indeed……………………….

Anyway, the kids in school were always asking me to tell them the hidden secrets of the tapes. It was the only thing people usually said to me that wasnt’ calling me a f$#cking loser or laughing at me for how i looked (girls) or laughing about how they were kickking my ass (boys) or laughing about how i just had my ass kicked for how I looked (boys and girls) so I was all too happy to tell them all the tape secrets I had. In that way they were all still my friends and when they beat me up it was more like a “hey man just messing with you” kind of thing. Except when Miles Fletcher did it but i will not talk about that now!!!!

So in the end I have defeated all bosses of Megaman X, and I am the one who beat all of the other Megaman Tapes Too!!! Even the ones that became lame little kid tapes like megamans 1-6 for NES. I got grown into a teen then NES was stupid but now as an old man I remember all of my childhood tapes and consoles as beaufitul. Like all my friends and adventures in high school…it all becomes one happy memory of my life that happened and if u think about it,,, that can’t be a bad thing at all. even if there was times you were crying for no reason, you can remember it and think “wicked..,” because maybe u played a cool tape or went on a cool adventure with a gun you found in the woods and no matter how lonely it gets sleeping on your mattress with no sheet u will always have that awesome memory of nintendo tapes…

Adventures of being Nintendo Tape Kid is one of my favorite memories and I really loved how you could charge up your X gun on your arm and shoot a boss in the face until he died in an explostion and that is why i give Megaman X nintendo tape for super Nintendo a
10/10

The classic adventure of teens and tentacles in an awesome game made years before dirty japanamation cartoons made it cool I mean scary.

This tape is hilarious and fun and hard as hell, and if you dump the pepsi down the kitchen sink you’re screwed and have to reset.

That’s why today’s review is the genius Maniac Mansion Nintendo Tape.

Maniac Mansion was the game where I went to move my guy and got mad because instead of making the guy move it made a mouse arrow move, and i had to use the arrow to click where I wanted him to go and then he would move. I remember being 11 years old and saying “WHAT” when that happened. This was a deeply confusing design choice to me. I was so mad. But the two dollars were spent and it was mine until sunday, so I parked it in front of my little 13 inch TV and stuck with it.

Let me tell you, I am glad I did!!! Because Maniac Mansion is a horror game, a puzzle game, and a COMEDY game all rolled into one! It has killer music, too. There is a song called DAVES’ THEME which is one of my favorite songs ever!! So cool. I would put the game on and let it sit there while I read books and jam OUT. And day dream that I was the one who saved Sandy except she was the girl I had a crush on and I was me and not Dave from the game.

So in Maniac Mansion Daves’ girlfriend Sandy has been kidnapped by the evil Dr. Fred, and he has her down in his basement and wants to suck out her brains I guess. There are a couple of intelligent tentacles who live there, and there is an evil meteor hiding out as well. The meteor is smart and he is the reason the Edison family are evil now.

In stories, meteors can be anything you want, because we don’t understand space. So it is a good idea to have them in your game.

You pick your team of three teens and then sneak into the Mansion using a key you find under the rug. See, in this game you have a set of menu commands to tell the teens what you want them to do. So if you want to check under the welcome mat, you use your arrow to click “pick up” then you click the welcome mat and if you are able to lift, it then it will move. If not it will do nothing. That is how you progress in this game. You pick stuff up then use it later in puzzles to open doors or help tentacles put out their demo tape to a record company. Normal puzzle things like that.

The problem is that the evil members of the family will toss you into their dungeon if they catch you or they will even straight up murder your a$$.

When you run out of teens it is GAME OVER for you and Sandy.
Another problem is that if you use an item wrong it can get used up then the game is unwinnable. So don’t dump the can of pepsi down the sink or you might spend an entire afternoon not being able to get past one part and have no idea why and feel like world’s biggest dum ass.

Did you ever find a gun wrapped in tin foil behind your house?
We did. You see, me and Byron had this hobby. Our hobby was on the weekends in 1988 we would walk down to the railroad tracks on the outskirts of town with his paperboy bag and collect railroad spikes that had come loose. You can usually find a lot of them in the gravel along the tracks. They’re old and rusted looking but still strong and usable. As we collected them, we would return to the woods behind our houses (the same woods you might remember from my bike path tragedy) and then commence to pounding them into this huge tree that was unclimbable due to not having any branches until the top.

It took a few weekends, maybe a months’ worth, until we had hammered enough spikes in to be able to reach the top. It was pretty high. But the cool thing about this tree was when you got to the top of it, there was a really flat part where the branches all radiated out , like it was made for sitting and chilling with your buds.

One Saturday Byron and I were down at the tree ready to hammer in some spikes when I spotted a thick square of tin foil. it looked like a shiny metal brick at first, but when I picked it up I realized what it was. It was just laying there behind the tree. I looked around and saw there was nobody but us down there. See, that big tree sat about ten feet away from a pond. No one ever went down there, we didn’t even know who owned it. But you could fish in it if you wanted.

Anyway, I opened up the tin foil brick and inside the many layers (must have used a whole roll of the stuff, damn) there was a real hand gun. Looking back now I would say it was a 9mm or something close to that.
Realizing I was holding an actual gun felt like what holding up the power sword in front of castle greyskull must have felt like to He-Man.

If you have never been a 11 year old holding a gun you found in the woods behind your house, then you wouldn’t understand. You feel like you are the strongest guy in the world. It was the first time I ever felt powerful. I guess that is pretty scary and I am sorry I said it. I wish there was a way to erase that but the delete button isn’t doing it and I don’t want to start my review over. So just ignore it sorry. I hate guns as a adult now.

I called out to byron who climbed down from where he was hammering in a spike and he saw I was holding a gun.

He flipped out “Where did you get that, is that real!!!” is what he yelled at me. I told him I think it is real!!!! It is heavy and does not feel like a toy. I handed it to him and he said he thought it was real, too. I explained where I found it and how it was all wrapped in foil.

We were still trying to figure out what to do with our bad ass new gun when we heard a voice behind us. “Hey what did you guys find?” It was Bill’s brother. We didn’t play much with Bill because he lived with his mom mostly in another town, but his brother Patrick lived across from us with their dad and he was like a senior and kind of a d!ck so we didnt’ deal with him much either.

We showed him the gun and he was surprised. He said “wow, someone just left a gun here?” and we said “I guess”

Well, he had a solution to our “what do we do” problem. He took the gun, wrapped it back up in the aluminum foil, then turned toward the pond behind our tree and threw it as hard as he could. It landed in the middle of the pond with a PLOP. He turned back to us and said “You guys would get in really big trouble if you told anyone you found a gun. So don’t tell your parents, and I wont tell mine either. I don’t want you guys to get in trouble. The cops might even come”

I said OK we won’t but Byron just walked away. He was mad and I wasn’t sure why. I followed him up to his house and we went to his kitchen where his mom was talking on the phone. She was always on the phone with some of the other moms on our block. They would usually discuss the moms and dads on our block that weren’t part of their circle. Byron immediately tells his mom. “We found a gun in the woods, then Pat came and said we would get in trouble if we told you, then he threw it into the pond.”

I was shocked!!! I always kept secrets, I couldn’t believe Byron would risk getting us in trouble with the cops like that.

She hung up immediately and told us to stay in Byron’s room. We could hear her call the cops and tell them what we told her. Then she hung up and called the other moms (we called their phone circle the “Nancy Spy network”) because they all had binuculars and would watch the neighborhood and then report on activity to each other. When Byron’s family got their first cordless phone he was mad because it meant Nancy could stand out on the porch with the phone in one hand and binoculars in the other and he was embarrassed. We knew our gym teacher’s wife was cheating on him way before he did. (he lived on the other side of the block) It was an affective network.

It did not take long to have a couple of cops, the entire neighborhood, and me and Byron and his mom back down to the scene of the crime. The cops asked us to describe where the gun landed in the pond and we told him, then their diver went into the water. It took maybe ten minutes before he found it. The cops thanked us and the group dissapated, it was weird seeing a big crowd of people down there in our hang out place, and everyone wanted to know “why the hell are there a bunch of rail road spikes pounded into this tree” and we were like “no idea”.

Turns out, Patrick was actually the bad guy! They questioned him after we told them what he said to us about keeping quiet and they found out it was a gun he stole from a house he broke into and robbed. He went away for awhile after that, and we were off the hook!

I should have known he was the villain all long because one time we were playing in the woods and he came up to us to show us his new “compound bow” by having me stand next a tree then shooting a “broad head” right into it. What a a$$hole.

That is why I give Maniac Mansion a 1/10!!!!! F@$ck you patrick!!!

guns are not a joke!!!!! please lock them up. then listen to this: